I’ve deactivated Instagram and Facebook and deleted the apps.

Well, the apps were already deleted and I was using the web page version, but I have removed all temptation now.

You know the dopamine addiction is real when you’re scrolling the baron land of facebook??? Combing through backpacker pages looking for jobs that won’t be available when you’re ready to start them.

It’s only been a day, but I have found myself looking through Flatmates and Reddit more.

It was already going that way anyway.

‘Social’ media is becoming very antisocial and not even interesting. There’s dumb stuff that, sure feels relatable, but also feels like people grasping straws to gain 15 seconds of fame.

I’m sick of the same people’s stories appearing – because stories is all that’s really live these days – but there isn’t really anyone else I’m interested in connecting with on there.

I never reaaalllyyyy related to the highlight reel stigma of Insta – or at least, I didn’t buy into it. But now it feels like everything is an ad, someone is trying to sell something or sell their way of life etc etc. I don’t really know what’s genuine anymore.

Not to mention, I am constantly loading the page to see if a certain someone has messaged me, then closing it again.

SHOCK-ING.

However, I will say I’ve come along way since this time last year when I would constantly have a pen-pal to message. There’s some attachment improvement there right??

I always kept Instagram for my close-ish friends and family and it was a place I’d post unapologetically.

I’ve tried to maintain that rhythm, however more people find you and suggested posts pop up rather than content you’re actually interested in (seeing what your friends are up to) and it just ends up being one giant ad.

Also I’m really grossed out by the concept of AI and the algorithm. I’ve lived 27 years feeling like a passenger in my own life, started to gain some control and now AI is trying to take it away from me again?

Fuck no.

I say we go back to Stardoll and Myscene.com.

Whatever happened to everythinggirl.com?

I enjoy self expression through content and I always liked having a social media platform for that, but I think I will start using the blog more.

So.

What have I been up to this week?

Not alot actually, sitting around like a wet blanket alot of the time.

I was reading Thorn In My Side – a book from the Sweetpea series. Classic me, standalone reading the last book from a 4-book series.

I really enjoyed it, the writing was really relatable. I would like to read the preceding books.

I finished watching Ginny and Georgia (new season coming out in June – yay!!). Sweetpea actually reminded me of Georgia, which kind of inspired me to finish watching the show.

I started listening to In at the Deep End by Kate Davies, which is an unusual pick but I’m really enjoying the accents and the dialogue makes me laugh.

I’m learning a lot about lesbian loving.

We watched The Wedding Singer today. Iconic AF, a classic film from my childhood and it was very enjoyable to watch but also funny understanding some of the references we didn’t get when we were little.

I’ve been feeling at a bit of a loose end this week – luteal was super subtle this cycle but giving more of a miserable whyiseverythingterrible baseline instead of meltdowns and I’ve been feeling disconnected from Faith.

I know I should just jump in and start meditating, but I don’t have much motivation at the moment. It’s one of those chicken or the egg situations, but I know it’ll come back around.

I’m super looking forward to hitting the road next weekend and getting back in control of my life/implementing discipline.

Also I’m going to try out Bumble BFF and try to meet some friends when I hit the Coast.

I need to start doing something social.

Catch ya x